Tapas - is the friction generated by going against the grain of habit, of complacency, of doing what's easiest, of getting away with things. Tapas is the intense and passionate feeling of striving to be the best you can be, which may mean shifting what you do and how you do it.
Need I really say more? It’s been a while since I have written but to be honest I only like to really post when something very meaningful is taking place in my world. When I feel the urgency to put it down and shout it from the rooftops. Since my previous post time could have easily passed by ten years, the shift, the change, the growth, the hardships, the repair, the joy, the love and the laughter. This is life, the ebb and flow of my world is a result of what I put into it. Recently I have begun to notice the sprouts that are appearing from the seeds that were previously planted, nurtured and cared for. The work I am putting into myself is my practice, and the complete bliss that pours from my efforts are beginning to show. How often have you put so much work and effort into something and the minute you start seeing results from said efforts you stop putting in as much work? I know I have done this on many occasion, almost like “cool I did it” and then just stopping. Unfortunately that isn’t how this works. The work has to continue being put in with just as much effort as it was before the results started showing, this is called maintenance, it is how we hold ourselves accountable. It is tough in the beginning, this is Tapas, the unfamiliar feeling of discomfort that comes with going against our habitual paths result in an internal friction of pushing against what is programmed within us, thoughts, actions, habits, etc. These paths are embedded so deeply within us from childhood that yeah…it’s going to take some dedicated time to make those well worn paths disappear only to be replaced by new paths, the paths of healthy and happy habits that contribute to a blissful life, a path that is you being the absolute best version of you that you could possibly be…that’s a lot of you’s, and something tells me that that means the work can only be done by (you guessed it) you!!!
Let me tell you a tale of my week thus far, the holiday time over, reality setting in, the quietness is what always suddenly catches me off guard. We live in a world of constant distraction, tv, social media, friends, family, a busy street, a crazy work load, a cat outside the window…squirrel!! But seriously it’s so easy to get distracted, or let me rather say “allow” yourself to be distracted. This week what keeps coming up for me is stillness and space, this pressing feeling of the need for stillness has been my intention and mantra all week. Today I went to get a reiki attunement done, as well as chakra cleansing and balancing, it was the most amazing experience, and a lot of things came up for me that I haven’t thought of in a while (that’s the distraction that’s been in and out of my world recently causing me to loose focus from time to time) I left feeling something so different, I couldn’t quite put my finger on it until I was almost home and I realized I felt hollow. Not the kind of bad hollow feeling, what I felt was complete space. Space inside me that felt like I could reach from any corner inside me to another with nothing blocking my way, my thoughts ran clear, my mind was still. Now I’m not saying if you do this you’re going to feel great, what I did this week was do me, I climbed into my thoughts, I realigned myself within and I prioritized “what I should do” with “what would I like to do” to make me feel like I am being the best version of myself. Everyone has something that lights their fire, something that makes them feel so incredible that you can’t quite explain it yourself, let alone to anyone else. For me that is returning to my breath, quieting my thoughts, going inward to realign, all this results in my outward self shining it’s brightest. When you have fire within, the friction, instead of pushing back at it, embrace it, this is your fire, this is you pushing yourself in the direction you know you should be going. When everything suddenly starts falling into place, the feeling that comes from that is so special, so personal and so unique. I feel blessed for my life, and all the people in it. I feel completely fulfilled knowing I am exactly where I am meant to be, at this time in my life, experiencing all the amazing things this new journey is placing in my path, then again I planted those seeds and I shall keep them happy, healthy and watered. What have you got to loose, go against the grain, chase after your fire!
Namaste xx